Wandering, not Lost: "Tubing" in Vang Vieng - a three-ring tourist circus

Everyone you meet north of Vang Vieng is heading there, everyone you meet south of Vang Vieng has been there. The latter are often hobbling, bruised, exhausted and look as if they have had the time of their lives.

I was not sure I was looking forward to this place which tourist guides paint as a three-ring tourism circus that any authentic backpacker worth his salt would avoid like the plague.

We have already established I shun this notion of lifting your nose at things considered overly-touristy and insisting on being a certain kind of traveler (ie the kind who looks at you from behind a mass of dreadlocks and says, horrified, "you have a JOB???"

Anyway, so after discussing it with people traveling north who had been there, I decided to embrace this strange party place and whatever craziness and unpleasant touristy-ness it threw at me with wild abandon and go along for the ride, rather than choking in disgust at the mass of westerners spilling around drunk, ruining the beautiful scenery.

We arrived in Vang Vieng slightly shattered after the crazy drive mentioned in the previous post, booked into some nice river bungalows just outside the centre and I realise my wallet is missing. With credit cards and drivers licence. Most South Africans will appreciate the pain of contemplating having to go to the licensing centre and queue for another drivers license.

Ten minutes later my tuk-tuk driver speeds down the driveway and hands it to me..... I gave him a fat tip, nearly hugged him and decided we needed a drink.

We arrived around 6pm and all one saw is stumbling, drenched ppl walking with tubes down the road in various stages of inebriation. I still did not know what exactly was happening in this town!!!

We went to a bar and found the party already in full swing with half naked people, also covered in paint (raising the mystery further) all over the show.

So we bought a bucket ( self-explanatory... a cocktail.... in a bucket) - turns out drinking dreadful Lao whiskey with 7-up or sprite makes it taste ok - spotted some friends from the slow boat who we run into every now and then and tried to join the party.

Getting into the swing of things

It was fun, one of our friends had practically broken his ankle, but danced on through the pain ( we saw him a day or two later hobbling valiantly through the streets) . Some guy stripped completely. It was crazy.

Hmm what am I in for, I still didn't know how 'tubing' could be so dangerous.

So.... Tubing 101

Firstly, what draws people to this playground appears to be a very relaxed attitude towards drugs common in the region. This is a menu I got hold of very publically displayed in Cambodia, as an example. Happy Pizza, Shroom Shakes, Ecstatic Pizza etc are all freely available.

Then you take the winding Mekong river, with bars scattered on either side, playing loud music, and buckets in the baking sun. Each bar has some attraction, including death defying swings that would probably pass no safety test in any country, zip slides, mud volleyball, mud pits, kareoke etc.

The idea is that you get in your tube and go down the river stopping at each bar. Many get stuck at the first three (like us) while some go the whole whack.

I had such a blast, the music was great. We got two people to a swing and I did some silly stunts flying metres in the air into the river. This is where some ppl get injured. Some guy cracked his skull being too drunk to let go at the right time. I was not comfortable with getting wasted and doing that, so kept the G & T's coming slowly during the day.

I didn't bring my camera but here are some pics from a friend of mine who has a waterproof camera, to give an idea!!!

The stunning limestone crags!

My favourite swing

Climbing up to a jump

Bars, tubes, thrilling rides

Mud Volleyball - I got so hurt and full of mud in this thing I can still taste it!!

Having got stuck at the top bars meeting loads of awesome people, some brightspark decided at 4pm to try finish the tubing which takes two hours, while the sun sets at around 530. So we set off downstream paddling like mad with my flip-flops to get back in time as you lose your deposit on the tube at 6pm.

It was freezing and slow going and we all got rather miserable, jumping out 1km before the end to catch a tuk-tuk.

We were exhausted as lack of sleep, long hours on the road and partying accumulated.

We sat down for dinner at one of the famous "Friends" bars that get slammed and it was actually so nice sitting there watching episode after episode of the sitcom. All the tables face in the direction of the table as battered tubers nurse the days injuries.

It's like you're always stuck in second gear....

I was ready for bed at nine, but somehow we ended up going for a drink, eventually moving to Smile Bar, one of the many bars along the island. Buckets, great people, limbo competition, drinking competition, bonfire and the token bottle-spinning barman who came tubing a year ago and hasn't left.....